Don’t shoot me! lol but as my frontal lobe developments, I’m realizing that hey I really don’t know what’s best for me! I get why it’s important to seek God first! Seek him in everything because we as humans don’t make the best decisions! And I FOR SURE know I don’t! We act off impulse, emotions, we only want to do what feels good and make decisions solely on what we see or what makes sense in that moment.
Being in charge of my own life is scary. Because if I’m in charge I don’t know if I am making the best decisions. Will my future self love it or hate me for it ? Am I doing this because it’s what I desire, or what I’ve always known. Am I moving practical? Should I stay here? Move? Decisions play a big role.
Even down to simple day to day things!! Being at the right place at the right time! Or opposite.
I NEED God! Like I really have to depend on him because I don’t know. Girls… I just don’t know. I don’t know the way. Every day it feels like I am walking through this blindly. And my only way is to listen to His voice and look for him in everything. It’s really that crucial.
So as much as it’s screamed to Manifest! Is that really the way to go? Are our emotions(flesh) in the driver seat? When I say all these things like to be rich, have a huge career, everybody knowing my name, etc will I even like the life I “create” for myself. When I get all those things will my peace be at risk? Because we don’t have the power to know the future! To know after I get the life “I” built does my soul still thrive?
Why do I say maybe manifesting isn’t the best? It’s from my own experience; I spent more time making sure I spoke all of the things I wrote down. I abused scripture for my desires. I took the good parts out about blessings. I was trying to avoid suffering. My motives became impure. I became impatient. Yes, I prayed but I had to make sure I spoke all of my decree and declares. This became draining. All my effort and energy were spent trying to manufacture my way into a “better” life. And I realized I took God out of it and became my own god. Trying to hold everything together by my own strength. I started to think if I don’t speak over myself then nothing will happen. I became the source. I was being the one who carried everything rather than just being the one who steward.
So, lets clarify, I am not saying to not speak over yourself. Yes, speak life with authority. But as children of God, He is our daily bread. He is the source. He holds it together. He is the provider. He is the writer of our story, so I don’t have to spend all of my time being the “creator” and worried if I speak this or that. I get to like a child. Dependent. Switching it back to praying more that my life unfolds the way it was already predestined. That not my will but Lord yours be done. Allowing me to release, relax, ride because He is the one in the driver seat not me.
Therefore…
Ask yourself and am I speaking over myself? Or is it driven by personal desires and wants? Am I replacing God? Am I replacing my reliance on God? His timing?
Talk to you soon, Key Lashaye🖤
p.s. we can’t escape the suffering
Romans 5:3-5 “Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.
